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Writer's pictureDebra Lee May

Getting Unstuck - From Darkness to Confidence

Updated: Jan 5, 2021

As the list grew and my time diminished, the more I started to accept other people's advice. The busier I got, the more overwhelmed I felt, and the less time I had to figure out what I needed for myself. With that, everything started changing, and it felt like I started losing myself in the thick of it all.



Growing up, I was strong-minded and opinionated. I flat out refused to consider alternatives to anything I wanted. While this thinking may not have always made me the nicest person around, it did make me confident and clear about what I wanted to accomplish in my life.


It also forced me to go for what I wanted, and I rarely took no for an answer. It served me well in growing my career and finding the love I wanted in my life. I was clear on my dream, and I went for it. I got that beautiful family and the thriving career I dreamt of as a little girl.


The more I wanted, the more I took on. I took care of my family, my career, some extended family, the house, and the list goes on and on.


As the list grew and my time diminished, the more I started to accept other people's advice. The busier I got, the more overwhelmed I felt, and the less time I had to figure out what I needed for myself. With that, everything started changing, and it felt like I started losing myself in the thick of it all.


The more my life filled up, the more help and advice I sought, and the cycle begins. Suddenly, everyone thinks they know what you should be doing and what's right and wrong for you. Then, for the first time, you start second-guessing yourself and think maybe they're right.


Then, it felt like there was so much riding on your decisions. It starts to make sense that you rely on others' suggestions and opinions more than the voice inside you, including feeling judged. The old you who knew what you wanted and never cared about what they thought starts to fade. New emotions like insecurity and doubt seep in. Before you know it, you start to wonder how you got here and if you can turn back?


I never thought any of that would ever happen to me, but I lost my way and all the things that I used to cherish felt different. I experienced darkness that I didn't know was possible but stayed determined to find a way out.


Now I know it's possible to bring it back the confidence you used to feel and become the person you are now, but stronger, smarter, and more aligned. It's possible to be clear who you are and what you want even when the voices and advice around you don't agree. Even if you're feeling stuck, you can realign and feel secure and confidant again.


It's time to start listening to yourself again, to the thoughts in your head, and the gut feelings of who you are. You rebuild the trust in yourself by listening to what you instinctively know is right. When you take the time to listen, your life will open up, and your confidence and clarity will guide you. Your focus will narrow, and you'll feel your strength returning.


If you've always like there's more for you than you're currently experiencing and you feel stuck, let's talk. If you feel like you've lost a part of yourself or your personality, let's get you back on track. Schedule a call here. I've been there, I get it, and I can't wait to talk to you.



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