• debraleegroup

How to deliberately readjust


I have to be honest. The last four weeks have been a whirlwind of both travel and emotion. Spending the day with my niece in Chicago, visiting my older daughter in LA, attending my younger daughter’s graduation in Missouri and this past weekend in St. Louis at Jamie Thurber’s live high-performance event.


I’ve been somewhat overwhelmed keeping it all together with my face-to-face clients and connecting with everyone here. Trust me, I know I am not the only one who’s busy, and everyone goes through periods of readjustment when life gets out of hand.


When I arrived at the hotel last weekend, I had a huge lump in my throat for my youngest daughter, Lana. She had four wisdom teeth pulled a few days before, and she was still in pain.

She came home from college on Monday, and she’s moving to Denver next week. So it’s a two-fold guilt thing where I feel I should be spending time with her while she is home and there for her when she’s in pain.


Guilt sucks! I get those guilt pangs thinking about my mom too. Living in a retirement home, she gets lonely for her family. I know I am so lucky to see her almost every day except, of course, for when I travel.


This list could continue if I let it. I used to do that. Thankfully, I finally understand that guilt is not worth the moment it is wasting.


The thing is when you’re deep into these guilt emotions of what “you’re supposed to be feeling,” it takes away from the experience of the moment and clouds your vision.


The hardest part is remembering that you can consciously change your thoughts and take back control of what matters.


Guilt feelings are your inner thoughts bringing you back to what’s significant and vital to you. It’s a reminder that if you’re taking something away, it should be worth your while.


This is not a judgment call on what you’re doing with your life, but possibly a little reminder that it’s okay to do things for yourself that help you to grow, feel good or relax.


To be your best for the people in your life, you need to continue to build yourself in every area. When you do the things that matter to you, you step further into your power.


It’s the shift from feeling the need to be there for everyone and leaving little time and energy for you. To being at your best, and standing in a place that you can take better control of the situation. When you are working towards your best self, you naturally uplift and empower those around you.

So, how do you turn around those guilt feelings when you are deep in the middle?


It is the process of consciously training your mind to stop and remember your focus. You need to consciously say stop and ask yourself what’s important right now. Why am I feeling this way? Is what I am doing in alignment with my goals? If not, ask yourself how you can redirect?


Starting each day journaling on what’s important to you, along with your goals and dreams, helps you keep that focus.


It’s the simple process of allowing yourself to start your day opening your mind and internalizing what you want for your life.


Guilt feelings are your body’s way of telling you to stop and deliberately readjust your focus back with your goals. They are also a catalyst for self-improvement and self-reflection moving you back to an alignment where life flows effortlessly.

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