• debraleegroup

How to quickly shift your mindset


I walked into the magnificent Langham boutique hotel in downtown Chicago.


I was amongst what I considered some of the most beautiful people in the world, and they looked amazing!


This was not the dress I picked out! I picked out the perfect dress for my niece’s black tie optional wedding 4 months ago. I loved it, and I couldn’t wait to wear it. It was black with a black sequined skirt and a gorgeous neckline.


Over the summer, I had gained a few pounds, and it no longer looked right on me. I used to be able to lose 5 lbs. overnight, but at this age, it’s not always so easy especially when my daughters are in town, and we are out every night.


So, I asked my stylist from trunk club to send me another box of dresses to try. I tried on everyone, and my kids were in love with this one. They insisted that I wear it. I was not comfortable and spent the next 2 days trying on every dress at every store I could get too. I finally resolved myself to this.


This is what I learned as I walked into the event.


My initial reaction was a terror in my chest. Oh God, what did I do? How could I do this to myself when the room was full of gorgeous well put together women in long black dresses, and of course, the bride in ivory & white. I stood out like a bright geometric puzzle!


It took me one second, and then I decided to realign and take control.


I said to myself this is it. This is the wedding you have been looking forward to, and I told myself that I was not going to miss out one second of fun or connection or being a part of this special day for the niece I loved so much.


So I wore what I considered to be the wrong outfit. So what!!


I decided to hold my head up and rock it as best I could! This is not something I would have been able to do so powerfully a few years back, if at all. The mindset work I have done and the powerful shifts I have made in my own life clearly showed me what was possible this evening.


It’s really never how you look or what you’re wearing. It’s only how you feel and the power you feel inside. I talked and laughed with family and friends and met some new people as well. And yes, I danced all night.


It was a decision that my outfit would not define who I was and how the night would go for me. It was an inner shift that allowed me to watch my niece walk down the aisle and focus only on her. It was a shift to connect and dance and make the evening as memorable as it was supposed to be.


Yes, I still wish I had a beautiful black gown that I felt matched the look of the evening.

But honestly, the idea that I didn’t and that I had to prove to myself that the mindset work I have been doing is working.


It not only changed the evening, but it has changed every aspect of my life. Having to overcome this, I feel unstoppable. I learned that the little outward things that you stress about really don’t matter.


Years ago, I was depressed and having difficulty leaving the house. Then I decided to take my power back and reclaim my voice. It’s possible!!


Love the dress! Hate the dress! Doesn’t matter!!


The ability to shift your mindset to power regardless of your circumstances is the key. You can redefine who you are and who you intend to be. It’s a decision and a simple shift.

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